Friday, October 12, 2007

to the adventurer that lies hidden in me

There exists an adventurer in me. That which yearns to explore new terrain. She made me shift to a new city.

Shifting to a new location; i knew i had to do it. Though my mother and M(to some extent) were quite against it. Emotions ruled mother high. Perhaps, i thought about it too. But, other ideas pushed it into the depth of my mind.

It resurfaced when i located to Mysooru. With a bang, i should say. Remembering my folks at home, M in a far away land; it is hard. To overcome it, i found it tough. Frankly speaking, i still am in the process.

I'm thankful to the wonderful invention called 'mobile phone', and the expressway between Bengalooru and Mysooru. It has me connected, with me travelling to Bengalooru frequently.

When M got married a little more than a year ago, i felt lost. I'm sure my parents felt stranded too. At the same time, i can say that i drew closer to my parents. Time helped to us understand each other better, it allowed for my personal growth, committing mistakes and learning from them. Understanding myself a little better, and polishing my habits.

That was also the time when i started liking responsiblities. Lending a hand when required, doing small chores in the house, looking after my parents when one fell ill. These small incidents made me bond closer to them.

And, now, here i am. Leading an 'independant' life. I feel troubled. Did i do the right thing by opting to stay away from home? Will my parents manage without me? Will not loneliness and helplessness bother them?

Both of them are hale and hearty. They look out for new means to spend time. Perfectly fine, so as to say. They appear comfortable.

Such thoughts plague me. Though, they are okay. And when i know that i need to pay more attention towards my studies. I hope i'm able to come out of this, using time, of course.


Anonymous said...

i think one or the other day a person has to overcome this hurdle , be it for any reason...and my understanding is that..facing life is the greatest...making us strong and to fight back..and im sure your parents have also understood this...time makes impossible possible....coz you have to me everything will work out..take care

VENU VINOD said...

mysore is a pretty good city, perhaps its softer than bengalooru in many aspects, i heard. elders once get superanuation, like to get settled in mysore

mouna said...

i hope that time will cure me. thank you :)

asking me, i would prefer bengalooru ;) i love this city. mysooru is on the quiet side, though.

The 'Ekaangi' said...

you are mirroring my thoughts right now ... coz everyday all i do is think whether i have the courage to face life far far away frm home for 5 or more years ... especially fr me who's too attached to family and cousins ... hope u'L have some positive feedback on yer stay away frm home

mouna said...

we've talked abt it earlier, alve?
please be brave, i don't want u to go weak like me.

Srik said...

very very emotional write up.

Reminds me of the initial hostel days where every 15 days or 4 weeks I'd find a reason to come home....

Ah! now it seems to me a story, but to go thru it is something really an ordeal...